I love order. I crave it. I like the same everyday. I used to be much stricter about these things, especially when it came to nighttime. Sleep is the holy grail for me and I can be super mom/super woman...but only until 8:00pm and then quite frankly, I am done!! So if something worked for the children-and by worked I mean they went to bed easily and slept through the night-then I didn't mess with it. I did everything the exact same hoping to have those same results.
I begin instilling bedtime routines right after birth. Right away, I choose the hour (usually 7) and at the feeding closest to that, I start doing my bedtime stuff-the bath, the pjs, the story, the crib/bassinet/our bed. Of course when they are so little, I know I will be up a million more times to feed, but at the youngest of ages, I want to start with a set bedtime. I did this for Seamus and Mahone both, and each had nice early bedtimes and for the most part, were good sleepers...(did you notice the past tense in that sentence!!)
Fast forward a couple of years, and well....things, they are a changing. I simply cannot do the same thing each night, and try as I might, Seamus is never-I mean NEVER-in bed until 9:00 (I am saying that because if I tell you the actual time most nights, you will judge!!) Mahone is sometimes in bed and asleep by 8:00, but that is a rarity-a nice treat, but unlikely. I am not sure what has happened in my house..and in my mind.. that the nighttime and the quiet of the house without the little ones has someone lost its appeal on me-or at least I don't seem to need it enough for me to actually stop the play, stop the "carrying on" (my mother's words out of my mouth), and actually DO bedtime.
I am that mom-the one I judge, the one I said I would never be...My children stay up too late, the snack like crazy between 6:30-8:00 (for Seamus, he is usually eating in bed until he is asleep for goodness sake!!), some times I forget to remind them to brush their teeth, Mahone still has a bottle (I can't bear to take it away-I mean, just a little at night can't hurt too much, right???), they sleep with us for the most part-Seamus almost all of the time and Mahone joins quite a bit as well, some nights Seamus doesn't do his homework/reading because we are too busy playing ball at the park, or playing on the trampoline-last night he came in from outside at 8:15-aghast I know... Even writing it, I cannot believe this has become my life... but guess what, it works. I like it!!! and while I know children need order, there is emotional safety in routines and structure, there is something about a life that "wings it" that my kids respond to...
In saying all of that, there are some things that are constants at night of course-we are just not constant on the timing. The order of events once in bed stay the same-but who knows when we will get there. For Mahone, it is story after story, a bottle, music on and I lay with him for quite some time. We always play this pretend game in which I am the baby and he is the mama and he tucks me in, and then we switch and I tuck him in. It is really sweet.... Seamus always goes to sleep in our bed and one of use lies with him as well. This is when he will talk about his day, the "incident" on the school yard, the new best friend, the play he is doing in class, some idea for an elaborate battle with his knights that he NEEDS to set up for tomorrow... I love, I mean LOVE those moments, when he actually lets me in his head!! The constant for Seamus is music. He listens to music..actually, the same CD, each and every night-without fail....
This band has to be one of his favorites... it sure is mine. My rule is that at bedtime, the music has to be Christian. It somehow is seeping in his head while he sleeps, and I need to know what is going in is good stuff, so with that rule, this is what he has chosen, night after night....I have to say, I don't mind it. Sometimes while lying with him, I need to have the words of that music seep into my head, as much as he....
Just for interest sake,
Me.
